Improving my behaviour

Essay about;

“IMPROVING MY BEHAVIOUR”

I’ve apologised for my behaviour a lot of times, but this time I’m really serious about it.
I’m looking for any possible way to learn how to improve my social skills, because I’m tired of being misunderstood by teachers. I never mean any harm when I raise my voice, or when I say ‘die gast’. It’s just a figure of speech. I say it to everyone I know and even to people who don’t know me. The people that don’t know me, they
I try to treat my teachers with the utmost respect, but some times it just comes out the wrong way.
This is because I have a tendency to stand up for my personal opinion, and sometimes it is misinterpreted by adults because of my vocabulary. The language I use, is often used by children of my age. I use it, in the wrong way, at the wrong time and in the company of people who will misunderstand me because of this. I know that it is wrong to make use of this way of speaking to anyone, whether I know them or that they don’t know me.

I take a little example of things I do in the lesson and which I want to improve. If I’m in (for example) the English class and someone says something that attracts my attention, I always respond. I never think before I act. I think and now I know that it bothers teachers and sometimes even my classmates.
When the class is over, I sometimes get reactions of my fellow students, and in most cases they are negative remarks about my behaviour or use of language during the lessons.
They sometimes blame me because they don’t get great marks, or because they couldn’t follow the lesson.
There is one thing that is true, and that I want to get rid of, which is my chatting during the lessons.

During the lesson, is almost every time there is someone saying something to me . I think it is a habit that I say something back to that person. But if the teacher is talking, I know that I must keep my mouth shut, as a matter of respect, but I still respond to the person who said something to me. BUT… It is also a matter of respect towards the teacher if I keep quiet. I’ve got a lot of respect for teachers, because they are willing to give their experience and wisdom to students, but I always try to say something back. On this moment the teachers think I don’t have any respect for them, and I try to get their trust back, but I have already lost hold of their trust. This is, in my opinion, a big shame, because you must do a lot of things to lose the trust of teachers.
I take an example of the trust that teachers have in me.
If someone who sits behind me, says something, the teacher often thinks that it is me. In this way, the trust disappears even more.

I train myself a lot at home, with friends or at school, with my behaviour. If someone makes an insulting remark, I now try to ignore it and not react to it. If a teacher says something and I have got a question, I try to put my finger in the air.
A year ago, my behaviour really took a wrong turn. I even went to the psychologist. I learned to think before I acted. It has shown improvement that is also remarked by other people, but I am still a noisy student.
I went to a homeopath, even though I didn’t believe that his treatment would make a difference in my behaviour. He gave me pills to calm down a bit.

I really want to get the teachers respect back.
I really want that my behaviour comes back at the right place, because besides the teachers and fellow student, there is one more person that is bothered by it… and that is me.